I can literally fall asleep on my notebook.

I'm dead tired although I've been a loyal member of the pig committee today.

I cam home I ate lunch I slept I ate dinner and now I'm stoning. I'm sleepy.

I should probably get some sleep now. Perhaps I'll finish up tt emath paper first. Remove tt tinge of guilt in me so that I can peacefully arrive in slumber land. Sigh.

Prelim's in less than a month's time. It's time to start studying.

Praying hard I'll manage my time better tmr. Till then, I shall doze off in 15 mins time.

Early nite (:

Yay

My giants

You think I have it easy in this life? I highly doubt anyone in the school has probably experienced what I am going through right now. I can say that I’m deprived of many things. This I don’t mean materialistic. I lead this life with so much pain that I never imagined I would have to go through when I was still younger. I dreamed of a fairy tale future. But what I got was the complete opposite; a living hell. Why has God put me in such a situation? Don’t I deserve a better life? Happiness is now a luxury to me. Something that I so longingly hope to have but could never get hold of it cuz it’s just too far within my reach. There’s a saying that says when a man finds himself wronged, condemned or in a catastrophic state that’s when he knows that he’s doing the right thing. But I doubt it was to my extreme. What I’m going through right now is nothing compared to what other teenagers my age has experienced. But I’m glad that God has made me more than a conqueror. The mere fact that I’m still alive and well justifies this statement. When will this suffering end? It’s just too much for me to take. I’m only sixteen but I have so many things to swallow. I just can’t find the courage to tell you what. But I know full well that God is in control with what I’m going through now. So I may not worry. And this has given me the courage and strength to go on with life. I’m facing my giants now - just a step closer to my promise land.

Today is a waste.

At home, at least.

I was quite productive in school. Did homework.

Yay.

I slept till 11pm after I reached home.

Now I'm wide awake.

I wanna bathe.

(:

Farewell

I just can't resist the temptation of blogging.

Anyway, I've completed studying for that SS test tmr. :S

I'm left with the "study plan" and my tuition hmwk. Dang. So many things to do.

Anyway, I just wanna blog a bit about Friday's farewell.

I LOVE THE FAREWELL LIKE HELLLLLLL!

Technically, hell's not lovable. It's just a way of describing things, you know?

Let's change it then.

THE FAREWELL KICK ASSSSSS!

That's much better (:

So, on Friday, after racial harmony day, which was a waste of time, (Not the idea of racial harmony but basically the whole activity planned for us was a WASTE OF TIME.) all the choir seniors were waiting impatiently in 4e6 classroom knowing full well the capabilities of our dear juniors in making this farewell out of the ordinary.

Coming back, we waited for more than an hour. But it was not at all a draggy wait. We joked and laughed. And joked and laughed. And joked and laughed. That's all to it mann.

And suddenly we saw two rather minute figures lurking behind the classroom door. There was Chien Hui and Priscilla. HAHAHA! Funny bunch of people. They kept on singing that God knows what 'That's not my name' song. Anyway, two by two the juniors escorted us to... the art gallery. Apparently they had a last minute change of plan. Anyway to cut the story short they brought us into the IT CONFERENCE ROOM and I was amazed at how much they had transformed the place. There was a u-shaped table (meant for a runway :S) with table mat on top of it and plates and forks and chips and our individual names on each of the plates. OMG! I was touched at that moment. Anyway, then we watched a really SADDDDDD video. Almost cried but I didn't. And they all came and sang 'Expression of Gratitude' and I almost died of COMPLETE EUPHORIA.

Then the seniors had to make individual speeches to the choir and the juniors to us and Miss Jane Tan and THE WHOLE THING WAS A DAZE TO ME BUT I KNOW I HAD A LOT OF FUNN. Then we ate. And they gave gifts!!! (Which I still have yet to prepare for them soooon) and all of us just went nuts after that. Btw, my speech was like, dun talk abt it. Too shameful for words. I wanted to say like 'suck' or 'shit' but I can't get it out of my damn mouth since there was teachers around. Anyway, it was already a good thing that S HO wasn't there. Or else I'll be frozen to the ground unable to mout a single word. Dang.

I LOVE YOU CHOIR PEOPLE!!! I'M GOING TO MISS YOU ALLLLL.

I tell you, right at that moment I never regreted joining choir. I wonder why. It was the second best CHOIR MOMENT of the century. The first was the concert.

AND THEY GAVE ME THE CHOIR CONCERT '08 DVD FOR FREEEEEEE! OMGGGGGGG!

I was darn touched mann!

I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU ALL TO DEATHHHHH.

Perhaps I'll join the alumni. Perhaps not? I will I guess?

I've pictures to show u guys! But I gotta wait for TABITHA and GERMAINE to send it to me.

((((:

I guess the farewell just erased away the 3 and a half years of shitty memories of choir. LOVE YOU GUYS LIKE HELLLLLLLL!

XOXO

OMG.

I'm doing the school survey noww.

=S

First survey: 114 questions

What the hell's collaborative? That's only question 2 btw. =S

Guess what? I picked up Mr Dicky and searched for the meaning of "collaborative".

It means:

1. To work together, especially in a joint intellectual effort.
2. To cooperate treasonably, as with an enemy occupation force in one's country

Ok. I guess it's the first one.

I need to blow dry my hair! 112 qns to go and 4 surveys left!

Done with one!

Second survey: 154 qns (WTHHHH)

Third surve: 154 qns

Just did third one. I'm dozin off! It's so boringgg.

Fourth survey: 113 qns (sigh)

VOILA!

Done.

I'm sleepy.

Sighhh.

SS SEQ Question

Just did my SEQ for SS tmr. It was boring.

It's 1.39 a.m. and I'm still wide awake. Damn. Going to sleep once I finish this post.

I had a hard time finding a topic for my SEQ qn.

I sat by my bed pondering days and nights on what my "master piece" should be about.

"______ is handsome. How far do you agree with this statement?"

"The _____ policy is delusional. How far do you agree with this statement?"

"Einstein is HOT. How far do you agree with this statement?"

These are just one of the many questions I considered before finally settling for the typical and boring "Globalisation is a success. How far do you agree with this statement?"

Sad sad life. I had wanted it to be Einstein. My stand is: He's HOT.

Ok. This is going a little out of hand.

Ah well. I better sleep and allow my cells to regenerate before I die of "stunted growth" due to deprivation of protoplasm synthesis in the night time.

Ah well. That's all.

(:

*snooze*

Are you there, God?

Are you there, God?

The world's secrets and what it has to offer to you is beyond human capacity to decipher.

Creating numerous uncertainties and, of course, much suffering.

Why chose to suffer a good 18 years when you can chose to get none of those?

Only one answer; you didn't see that coming.

The devil uses the people's weakness to bring pain to others.

What an unfair world.

Just playing along... ((:

Rules of the game:
A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
B) Tag 8 people to do this quiz. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. How has blogger changed your life?
What's so life-changing about

2. Do you daydream and if you do what do you usually find yourself 'dreaming' about?
YES, like 24/7? I dream about anything and everything.

3. What do you want to be when you grow up?
A jazz singer and a cardiosurgeon!!! Though they are world's apart. ((:

4. What is the city of your dreams and why?
PARIS!!! I love the way french people talk! BONJOUR! Very romantic. I wanna elope to Paris. :P

5. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
Introvert. Extrovert. Does it matter? I got the best of world worlds. (Btw I'm not quoting Hannah Montana :S)

6. What is your opinion on eating meat?
Well, meat's very nutritious considering the amount of protein-content. Totally important for tissue regeneration and protoplasm synthesis. A very good source of nourishment and it tastes SINFULLY GOOD.

7. Do you trust easily?
I have trust issues. -.-"

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Get another one!

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
The fat pig.

10. What is your worst quality?
I'm a vervent slacker.

11. Is being tagged fun?
It's alright. HAHAHA.

12. How do you see yourself?
I really don't knowwww.

13. What do you wish to change about yourself?
I gotta stop slacking and get over the fact that O's in 100 day's time. Or issit 99 days?

14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Issie: FUN AND LOVEABLE! My courtsey friend!

15. What would you do if you won the lottery?
SHOP, SHOP, SHOP and SHOP!!! TRAVEL, TRAVEL, TRAVEL and TRAVEL!!!

15. Would you rather be in a happy marriage and poor or a bad marriage and rich?
Happy marriage and rich! (((:

16. Before you go to sleep, what do you usually think about?
Life. I'm so emo. HAHAHA.

17. What question do you want to know the answer to?
Why is the sky blue? Why is the grass green? HAH!

18. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
The one who loved me moreee.

19. Would you have 100% safe sex with a stranger for $10,000,000?
I'll take the money and run awayyyyy. HELL NO!

20. What were your parents going to name you if you'd been born the opposite gender?
I dunno. What do u think?

Tag you're it: Jeannette, BO, Huiying, Cheryl Liew, Ulin, Hidayah... Who else has blogs and actually update them? Whoever you are, you're tagged! :P

I'm playing along with this game cuz I got so bored of doing the SS hmwk. Dang it's dreadful. Oh yeahh! (((:

I'm feeling sleepy.

*yawn*

I dun really feel like blogging right now.

ok, byebye.

I have failed (again) to religiously update this blog.

Damn.

Ok, just a short update on my life.

It's been a little sucky the past week. But it's going better now.

Probably it's one of those days where my hormones just fluctuates in concentration in my blood stream. :S

My brother got his tonsils removed. Eww.

And I screwed my speech day walk today. :S Dang dang dang dang dang. It was a mere task of walking and bowing and I screwed it by floating across the stage, thumped my body onto the spot where I had to bow and "curtsied" instead of bowing. Haha. But after the incident I did find that even rather hilarious. Hope it won't happen next week, though. *flush*

Prelim's in 45 days time and it'll be wise of me to detach myself from any form of entertainment. But it's just so hard to part from my everyday ritual. :S

Boohoo.

Oh, I love Tristan Prettyman's "Smoke". :P I especially like the guitar part. Yay.

Back to cme and then sleep. (:

I'm trying my best to religiously update this blog cuz I understand that I've been neglecting it for some time already.

Ok.

When a person experiences a problem, a huge one that is, such as the loss of a loved one, he or she will most probably undergo 4 stages of emotions before he or she is back to his or her normal self. It goes like this:

1) Denial
2) Anger
3) Sadness (Grief)
4) Acceptance

However in my case, there is no denial for I am NOT in the wrong. So probably the other party is in denial. Haha.

Right now I'm encountering my second phase which is anger. I feel extreme anger so much that it became suicidal. NOT. But yes, I do feel angry. At least I'm sane enough to identify the emotion. Haha.

Apparently, sadness came before anger in my case. Probably because there was no denial in the first place. So I guess the whole order is screwed. Ah well.

I wonder when I'll reach the "acceptance" stage since I can't picture myself being physically and mentally in that stage since there was and most probably will never be a solution and an ending to this problem. Wanna know why? Cuz I dun expect any resolutions to be made by the other party cuz they're of a DIFFERENT STATUS from me. Heh. What a "democratic" world we live in. Nevertheless, I'm always ready to make resolutions. Please do take your first step.

Aww mann. I feel like I'm in a wreck. And I guess I've yet to post my pictures when I went to Indonesia last month. There's so much stuff to show! Haha. I shall post a picture of all my cousins and my grandma for the time being. But my brother's not in it since he didn't go to Indonesia cuz he got a NPCC CAMP which was so important to him. Hahaha. I shall photoshop him another time. :P

My cousins and I with Granny (:

Stick your tongue out!

Mario (my brother) who was not there to take a family picture with us since he was busy torturing himself in his NPCC camp. :S

(He was acting cool)

Jesslyn! Ini gambar koko mario sama Ii Ani and Uncle Paulus di kereta (: